Monday 18 August 2008

an eye catching discovery...



Spain's Olympic Basketball Team, "preparing for Beijing"


Spain's Federation Cup Tennis Team


These look like the kind of hideously ill-advised photographs one might expect to be revealed by chance after a long trawl through various social networking sites. However, they came from Marca, one of Spain's best selling daily newspapers, and the official website of the Spanish Tennis Federation, respectively. If you're going to do something quite so stupid, why do it quite so publicly?!

It must be pointed out that China is not merely an innocent victim here. I happened to be watching the BBC's Olympic news roundup which is accessible via the 'red button', which showed the moment China won (yet another) gold at table tennis. When one of his German opponents hit the ball out to finish the match, one of the Chinese players celebrated the victory with a Nazi salute, coupled with a finger under the nose to denote a Hitler-esque moustache.

While I'm sure table tennis does not gather in a massive television audience, I cannot be the only person to notice this- it was pretty blatant, and the BBC have been playing it on loop all day! However, I can find no mention of it on the internet, and so thought I'd do the honours.

I really would recommend the red button for the Olympics though. None of the tennis was covered by BBC One or Two, and many other exciting sports miss out on premier schedule slots. I got to watch GB triumph over South Africa in one of the men's hockey pool matches, a bittersweet victory as my school's visiting hockey coach, Marvin Bam, was playing in defence for SA. That said, it was nice to see his face again- Google him and you'll see why!

Tuesday 8 July 2008

Ten Years Younger

I don't know why, but every tuesday I tune into Channel 4 at 8 o'clock to watch the hideous spectacle that is 'Ten Years Younger'. Let's just run through the 'Michelin starred team of experts':

NICKY HAMBLETON-JONES

There aren't strong enough words for the way I feel about this harridan! Mostly it's her no doubt self-proclaimed status: fashionista. Why would anyone take fashion advice from this woman? She dresses appallingly herself, and her approach to dressing her victims is entirely formulaic: coloured tights, pencil skirt, hideous tunic worn over long sleeved top and a massive black belt round the waist to set it all off.
In addition to that is her stupid glasses. How many pairs does she have? She'd have been far better using the no doubt exorbitant amount spent on them all to buy one pair that are actually NICE! What's worse is, whenever her subject wears glasses, she sends them off to have laser eye surgery- what a hypocrite!
I also find her unneccessarily cruel in her put downs. Trinny and Susannah pull off the tough love because they are at least compassionate. She is just vile, I can't STAND her!

JAN STANEK

This man is just creepy- that bit at the beginning where he snaps on the rubber gloves, and indeed this picture, make me shudder. I do find the surgery element to the show a bit off, to be honest. Gok et al work with what they have (and create better results, in my opinion), while 10YY is a total overhaul and I don't think that's a positive message to be sending out. Also, what's all this about him being a top surgeon? As far as I can see, he's only capable of acid peels and brow and face lifts!

ANDREW BARTON

Looks like a small child who's just found some scissors and is about to hack off the hair of his long suffering childminder: I would not let him touch my hair! He seems to have a thing about 'expensive blonde' (maybe he should talk to NHJ about this?), and like Stanek a bit of a one trick pony: obviously left hairdresser school after being taught how to do a bob!


LISA SHEPHERD

There are awards for everything these days, and this woman has one for colouring hair. I suppose if she is the best it's only a pity she can't do herself, although I do doubt this accolade as she never manages a terribly convincing colour on any of her charges. With this said, I do think it is wise of Nicky not to let Andrew anywhere near strong chemicals- all hell would break loose!



UCHENNA OKOYE

I don't have a problem with her as such, though I do wish she would veer away from veneers! Everyone on this programme does have dreadful teeth, but a bit of whitening and some braces is surely all that's needed in most cases. I rather feel that when (as she never hesitates to point out) each tooth costs between £800 and £2000 and she knows Channel 4 is footing the bill, floating pound signs cloud her judgment and she goes all out. The procedure wrecks the actual tooth, and therefore they need to be replaced every ten years, presumably by Uchenna...

LISA ELDRIDGE

The only expert worth the name, in my view. She always does a good job, and does so in a way any viewer could achieve. I reckon she should assasinate the others and do the whole programme herself. The end result wouldn't be much worse: all they ever need is a bit of make-up, better clothes (and Lisa dresses far better than Nicki!), and some confidence!



This is basically a much condensed version of the conversation that takes place between my parents and I every week, and yet we still watch this drivel without fail- 5 series on! It still escapes me why anyone would apply to be on the show, and my greatest ambition in life is to one day be approached by Miss Hambleton-Jones so I can tell her I believe her companion is about 18 months old. Let's see what that does to her stupid average!

Monday 7 July 2008

¡Vamos Rafa!



This has to have been the most exciting five hours of television I have ever seen! We had about 15 people in our drawing room drinking Pimms and screaming. Only three of us, myself included, were supporting Nadal, and by the final set I had very little skin left on my knuckles: I thought he'd do it in straight sets! His post match celebrations made me want to cry!

However, I was alarmed to see Gavin Rossdale making what looked like several Facist salutes at Federer- what was all that about?!

Thursday 3 July 2008

He's got high, apple pie, in the sky hopes...

I've just come across Dinner in the Sky on Top Left Pixel.


Radisson, Dublin


San Pellegrino, Brussels




Dolce, Brussels


Renault, Bratislava


Dubai

The photos actually make me feel sick, so god only knows how I'd be able to eat up there. You can rent, or even purchase one- WHY?!

That said, the food looks pretty good, and I'm rather intrigued as to how its done (though not enough to try it out!)...

Monday 30 June 2008

Glamping

Forget floral playsuits, Veuve Clicquot wellies and battered straw trilbies, I have achieved the ultimate level of festival style:


Cold? Tent too far away? Commandeering your father's anorak and converting into a fetching pair of jodphur-esque pants=the answer!


In all seriousness though, these were the main trends I observed at Glastonbury this year:
  • The aforementioned battered straw hat.
  • Floral EVERYTHING!
  • Wellies, of course. Ideally either patterned (though I really cannot stand patterned wellies), Hunter or Joules. Most had long socks peeking over the top, sometimes in rather dubious neon argyle check.
  • Due to the (fantastic!) weather, a lot of canvas pumps were seen peeking out from the sea of rubber feet.
  • Oddly, I saw a lot of UGG boots. Sorry to say, I don't have anything against UGGs, but I wouldn't wear mine to Glastonbury considering the cost...
  • Shorts: very sensible as if your jeans get wet it's utter misery, and mud splattered legs can easily be sorted with a daily wet-wipe shower!
  • Hoodies. Mostly leavers' hoodies (guilty!), ideally from a reputable public school, but lots of university stash, Topman and Jack Wills, as well.
  • "Kanye West glasses", in all colours, which were on sale EVERYWHERE for extortionate prices.
  • Dresses, dresses, and dresses.
  • And at Dizzee Rascal (yep!), lots of those ridiculous baseball caps which look a bit like riding hats!

    Overall, Lupe Fiasco was my definite favourite, which was a surprise and possibly due to pear cider consumption. I also felt Jay Z did an amazing job, using his criticism to actually blow his critics out of the water. I bet that oaf, Gallagher, is seething...
  • Wednesday 23 April 2008

    You know you can't Rome without Caesar!

    So Urban Outfitters has some kind of Grecian/Roman theme at the moment. Rumour has it that, post A level, Dr. G has a party at her house for all the A level classics students. I for one hope this is true, because I love latin, and Dr. G for making me at least understand part of it, but also as I have now even planned my outfit!









    Urban Outfitters is always hit and miss, but right now I LOVE everything, which sucks as I have no money having just paid the deposit for a six week tip to Sydney.


    (Oh, and I passed- does anyone ever fail?!)

    Monday 21 April 2008

    "the maximum speed limit is NOT a target..."

    I have my driving theory test on tuesday, so much of this weekend has been spent ignoring any homework that isn't due before wednesday and reading the Highway Code. A weekend of cramming this will hopefully have me set for 50+ years of driving...



    I was shocked to find under article 206 that I should drive slowly and carefully when...
    "...passing parked vehicles, especially ice cream vans; children are more interested in ice cream than traffic"

    Are ice cream vans really that much a feature of modern British life that they warrant a particular mention in the Highway Code? I don't think I've even seen one since I was about 4, and my edition was published in 2007!


    Picture from urban75

    Saturday 12 April 2008

    "We're as British as Jonny Wilkinson!"

    I'm going to make a shameful confession here and announce that there is a part of me, admittedly the privately-educated-UGG-boot-clad part of me, that quite likes Jack Wills. Their shirts, shorts, bags, pyjamas, underwear and, dare I say it, at times their sweatpants are, for the most part, well made and pretty covetable. Sure, there are other brands I'd rather wear, but you could do much worse.

    But the one thing I can't stand are those hoodies:











    Just no. So many girls at my school have that "Possibles vs. Probables" one and you just want to shout, in the style of Harry Enfield:

    "OI, TOSSER, NO! A) YOU DON'T EVEN PLAY HOCKEY AND B) THAT TEAM DOESN'T ACTUALLY EXIST!"

    If you're going to spend £64 on a hoodie, you may as well get one that doesn't scream "Hi, I'm a tit!"

    Thursday 3 April 2008

    SOS!

    I have been strangely coveting what is essentially a tank top for a while now. My interest was originally engaged by this:


    Quayside women's halter neck cable knit jumper, £35, Joules

    And then refreshed by this:


    Cotton Grandad Tank, £35, Brora

    Seriously!
    a) What the fuck would I wear it with?! When would I WANT to wear something sleeveless yet made of wool?
    b) More importantly: I am 18, not 48! I should not be buying clothes from Brora or Joules, nor, having already done so, consider doing it again!

    I've also been flicking though (my mother's...) Boden catalogue and ended up wanting several items. I should be looking at Topshop and French Connection, not bloody housewife wear!

    Tuesday 1 April 2008

    Fait du ski-ski!



    Gorgeous weather, gorgeous snow, gorgeous resort, shit food. All in all, a very nice Easter break!





























    All that remains now is beaucoup de revision, chizz!